Hurt
by hind1252
Summary: "Can you just stop pretending? Quit acting like you care!" He screams at her. "What's wrong with you! How can just stand there and lie to me over and over again? Are you really that heartless!" Headhunters idea. Caskett! Enjoy


**Disclaimer:** I Don't Own Castle... In real life

**Spoiler Alert:** Up to Headhunters Promo

**Enjoy ;)**

**Hurt**

Kate stares at the man she once knew to be her partner walking towards her. A blood stained napkin ornaments his nose. As he gets closer he smiles at her. It's not his best, but it's something; she'll take it.

"Afternoon Detective"

"How was your 'hunt', did you catch the bad guy?" Sarcasm drips from her statement.

"It was great! It's nice to see how a real cop catches a bad guy for once" He smiles, seemingly unaware of the insult he'd just inflicted.

"Castle, can I talk to you in private please?" Kate manages with an irritated tone. Rick and Kate make their way through the station and enter the empty break room. "What's going on with you? One minute your fine and the next you're running off punching people with two bimbos on each arm!"

"Are you kidding me?" The look on his face nearly broke her. Pure anger screamed her name. Her heart just about burst that moment, but she stood strong. He wouldn't treat her like this, she's not a child. Her face mirrors his as the anger burns inside her. Just as she is about to snap, something stops her. It's only a flicker; the smallest possible measurement. But it was there, embedded deep within his expression; hurt.

She stops, takes a step back and looks at him. She sees it; everything he'd been emitting was a facade. He's lying to himself. All the anger is empty; the only thing behind it is hurt. She looks at him. Stares. Concern now radiates from her expression.

"Castle," she gasps out. It hurts her seeing him this vulnerable. How could she not notice it before, he's dying on the inside. Her innards crumble along with the feign anger she was holding. Everything vanishes and she sees him, all of him. Anger drips from her resolve and concern finds its way in. Nothing makes sense. All she could think to do was run over to him and capture his body in her arms, never letting go. But she didn't. She couldn't, not when his eyes were still burning with furry. She reaches her hand towards him but he quickly pulls away.

"Can you just stop pretending? Quit acting like you care!" He screams at her. "What's wrong with you? How can just stand there and lie to me over and over again? Are you really that heartless?"

She breaks. Her heart shatters on the ground. She's lost. Tears make their way into her eyes but she refuses to let go. The fire in her flares. She looks back at him as a stray tear rolls down her face. His expression is different now. She could see the hurt push its way past the anger. '_Heartless'_. Is that what she is? Heartless? The word echoes through her a thousand times. Her eyes find their way to the ground and they rest there. She takes a step back and sits on the back room chair.

"Kate…" The word is lost in the room. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that." He steps closer to her and kneels to her height. "Hey…" His hand finds its way to Kate's and holds on. Despite his wishes, the anger that was once dictating his actions is slowly losing power. His sole purpose now lies in front of him in the form of a beautiful woman. He watches her for a moment, waiting for his mind to adjust to his newly found emotions.

"What do you want from me?" She whispers. Anger lines her words but she hides it.

"I want you to be happy." It's an automatic response. The answer he thought was obvious. She looks up at him. Her expression makes his whole body tremble with doubt. '_I want you'_ he corrects but the thought doesn't escape his mind.

"Then why are you making me so miserable?" She lets a little anger slip with the question.

He's taken aback. The sentence dances around his mind. '_Why am I making her miserable? To punish her for not loving me? For hurting me?'_ "I'm sorry" His hand falls from her as he stands. Anger flickers through him once more. He's not doing this anymore. He turns around and walks away.

"I'm sorry? Is that all you have to say? You're sorry? Bullshit! What the hell's wrong with you? What did I do? Why don't you stop acting like a coward and tell me?" All the anger in her rushes forward. All the emotions all the memories everything slams her forward. "This is pathetic!"

"Bullshit? Really? Is that what this is to you? Is this what you think of me? Want me to stop being a coward? FINE! I'm in love with you Kate! I've been in love with you for a long time now but you already knew that didn't you! And instead of just telling me you didn't feel the same you hid it? What did u think would happen? Did you think I'd forget I ever said it and that I'd just stop loving you altogether? Like this was some kind of phase? Is that it?" The words tumbled out of his mouth freely; the confession is practically cathartic. "You can't hide behind the accident anymore" He finds Kate completely speechless, without even waiting for a response he turns around and storms out.

Rick slams the door of his car and makes his way up to his apartment. Once inside he waits for the rest of his body to catch up with him. He runs his hand through his hair and exhales. '_It's over.' _Despite everything she's done to him, he still feels like a part of him is torn. "Alexis! Mother! I'm home" The silence deafens him. Nobody's home; '_Great.'_ He makes his way to his study and shuts the door behind him. He looks at the time: 4:17 p.m. Exactly 12 minutes since the argument; perfect time for a drink.

Just as the pain begins to numb, a piercing knock echoes through the house. Rick stirs the drink in his hand a few times. The bottle of Scotch is nearly half empty, he's ready. He sets the drink down and takes his time walking to the door. He sighs deeply and opens the door. The presence of Kate doesn't faze him at all, he was expecting her. He sighs again and runs a hand through his hair; his exhaustion is evident.

She just stands there for a good minute staring at him, not knowing what to say. She had gone over every detail of the argument; everything she wanted to say was listed in front of her but now that she's here, it's all gone. He steps aside and lets her in. Halfway towards the couch she turns around. "I'm sorry for not telling you"

Castle's mind goes back to the argument. How when he had apologized to her, she had snapped. He debates on whether to do the same, but decides against it. He's too exhausted to fight. "It's fine, I don't care."

"No it's not fine Castle! Stop pretending everything's fine, because it's not"

"What do you care? I'm just your partner; once I'm gone you can find another 'partner' and forget all about me." All the anger comes flooding back.

"Castle you're not just a partner"

"Oh yeah, than what am I?" He stares at her, daring her to answer but she's out of words. "That's what I thought" His heart shatters at the wordless acknowledgment. He gets up and walks back towards his study when a sudden thought stops him. "Actually you're right I'm not your partner, I'm Slaughter's partner now"

"Are you kidding me Castle, you're doing all of this because you think I don't love you? Who told you I didn't love you? You honestly think I would have kept you around if I didn't?" Kate runs a hand through her hair and exhales. "I get that your imagination gets the better of you but honestly Castle this is pathetic! I thought you understood what I meant back at the swing set. I didn't tell you because I wasn't ready Castle! I thought you knew that."

The resolve he once had shatters as her words sink in. "I'm such an idiot" He whispers and looks up at her. He rubs a hand down his face. The past few weeks flash around him. He rakes his hand through his hair once again and sighs. Finding a place on the couch, he looks up at her.

"Yeah you are." She walks over to him and sits beside him placing her hand over his. They stare at each other's hands and Rick intertwines their fingers. "I'm sorry, I should have told you. It wasn't fair of me to keep it from you. I'm really sorry," she looks up at him "I never meant to hurt you." Rick's eyes are glued to their hands; his expression unreadable. He sits there thinking for what seems like a year. With every passing second, Kate loses hope. "Castle…" She looks at him, willing him to look at her. When he finally makes eye contact, Kate loses all hope. He looks miserable.

"How am I supposed to trust you?" His eyes bore into her. He lets go of her hand and stands up. "I can't do this anymore; a man can only take so much pain." He looks back at her shaking his head. A sigh escapes as anger bubbles inside of him. "How is it possible to never want to see you again and want to grab you and kiss you senseless all at the same time? How are you doing this to me?" He sees Kate look at the ground, her hands move up to cover her face. She's not crying, just thinking. How do you react to a statement like that?

Kate rakes her hair back with her hands and stands up. Rick watches carefully as she walks towards him, her eyes still on the ground. When she finally stops and looks up at him, she's only a few inches from his face. He doesn't move, doesn't look away. Rick sees her place a hand on the side of his face. Her lips find his for the briefest moment, then gone. She pulls away only a second after she kisses him. The second Rick meets her eyes, a tear slips from them and she steps back. Without a second look, she walks away. Out the door, out of his life. A million thoughts run past him. When he finally turns around, she's gone. _'She's gone'._

Kate walks into her apartment, broken. She slides down the closed door and cries. He hadn't stopped her. _'It's over'_ did she really think he'd come after her? She lied to him every day for 7 months. _'I have no right to be mad'_ but she is. Her mind travels back to his living room after the kiss. His face was blank. _'Blank, nothing.' _She lets out a final whimper and takes in a shaky breath. She stands up, in need of a shower when a knock from her door startles her. She tries unsuccessfully to diminish the growing hope that surrounds her. Making her way back to the door she deliberately avoids looking at the peep hole fearing her escaping hope will be crushed. Once she opens the door, the man on the other side stood staring at her; his hand at mid-knock.

They stared at each other for a few endless seconds before he steps towards her and seals the space between them forever.


End file.
